It seems to me that the merciless are reported on far more than the compassionate.  The first story on the news is either controversial or downright terrible.  The cover of the newspapers (if anyone reads those things anymore) follows suit.  And today, I was thinking about this in the context of growing up in Niagara Falls – just how often I was worried about the bad things.  There was the kidnapping and murder of Adam Walsh that loomed large in my childhood, and the fact that a physical beating could come from well…just about anywhere.

As the years wore on and I developed into a typical teenager with a not-yet-developed prefrontal cortex, the underpinning of my childhood – which I defined as real, was real in its consequence.  In other words, I was driven to think things and do things that were in accordance with my view of the world.  And the world was a dangerous place.  So, I had to learn and practice wrestling, karate, and judo.  Sometimes, I wonder if it was the reason I ran cross country.  I said it was to lose weight for the wrestling season, but sometimes I think it was because there is always tremendous value in being able to run like hell for a really long time.

Then, I was required to go to church, school, and CYO…such safe places (not).  And I remember being there, at Our Lady of Lebanon reading these passages.  Most often, they made little sense to me until I found one that stuck with me.  I remember what it said but not where it was…so I googled it.  Book of Samuel.  It said he teacheth my hands to war so that a bow of steel is broken by mine arms.  Interesting, huh?  Then there were the days in the gym…lots of them.  Why?  Looking back at it all, I know there were a lot of fellas like me.  And I also know that there were a lot who really weren’t.  And after all of that work that went into being ready for hands to fly or feet to run, I sit at my keyboard thinking about relationships, compassion, connections, and what more can be done to foster them.  Or, in other cases, what happens that wrecks them?

Why all this, Mike?  What’s this about?  Today, a case study was released from the active shooter situation in Uvalde.  That’s where nineteen children and two teachers were killed in May of 2022.  When these things come out, I always read them – because there are things that we have to know – things that we can think about, and ideas we can use in our endeavors to keep our kids and staff safe.  When you read stuff like that, it just gets you thinking, you know? Thinking about our childhoods and what went down.  Thinking about our own kids’ childhoods and what we want to be sure does NOT go down. 

Then…while thinking about the active shooter or the foxes looking to get into the henhouse, we have to think about what is happening in our schools between our kids, like how they treat one another.  Because we cannot forget the seriousness of that either.  Thirteen years ago this month, a teenager in Massachusetts took her own life after being bullied mercilessly by classmates.  A state law that pertained to bullying in its aftermath was passed, and I know that other states adopted similar legislation as well.  We work a lot with our students on what they do and say to each other.  The kids that picked on that girl until she killed herself are about 30 now.  I wonder if they think about what happened everyday of their lives.  I wonder about the staff who knew her – the ones that tried to do something and the ones who wish they did. 

Think about this…the divorce rate is 56%, nearly 400,000 children in foster care (10,000 here in Massachusetts), and 37% of men and women have been victims of severe physical violence from an intimate partner at least once in their lives.  Of our kids, one out of seven children is reported to have been abused by a caregiver – and this is only what is reported. Do we worry more about Uvaldi, what is happening in our hallways, or what is happening in our kids’ homes?  

I’ll end this one with a multiple-choice question:

What will you be like today?

A) Merciless

B) Compassionate

Sorry, you can only pick one and there are no in betweens.