The Reason Pinnochio Matters: It’s the Nose!

Fantastic news out of Big Pharma today!  There is a new wonder drug – a pill in the final approval stages with the Food and Drug Administration (FDA).   Although it has yet to be named, many have been waiting for this.  In a double-blind study, those who were administered the drug who previously inflicted pain, anxiety, stress, frustration, anger, heartbreak, and harm on those around them found it nearly impossible to do so anymore. It is pretty intense.  Just one single pill alters the genetics of the person who takes it.  The pill has been scientifically engineered to impact every person who takes it differently.  It is all made possible by nanobots or something like that.

I’d Purchase Shares of this Stock!

Here is the way it works.  Once it is in the system, this genetically altering substance causes certain aberrant behaviors to change the appearance of the person who takes it.  In the study, the most common effect that researchers noted was that when a person lies, their nose actually grows.  They appropriately called this the Pinocchio Effect.  In a smaller group of people, those chronically angry at others and the world – their noses flair, they grow fangs, their eyebrows scrunch, and they periodically grunt.  And even more importantly, those denoted as scam artists had a sticky substance secreted from their hands.  Each time one of these subjects bamboozled someone, their hands became increasingly sticky, to the point of being unable to physically touch anything without sticking to it as if by super glue. 

This Must be a Tough Guy

One of the study subjects was a well-dressed, well-spoken, high-ranking official known for bullying anyone he thought was weaker or had a lower income than him.  The drug caused hands to swell and grow five times their average size.  Then, his hands clenched into fists that he was unable to open. The poor dude was no longer able to wear a dress shirt.  A lady in the study, known by those around her to be a constant pessimistic complainer who blames others constantly, had her arm freeze into a position where her finger pointed everywhere her eyes went.  It was crazy.  No matter how hard she tried, she could not stop pointing at others. 

The Sooner You Turn Away, The Better Off You Will Be

What the researchers did not expect wasn’t the drug’s impact on the people who took the pill.  Rather, it was the impact on those around them who could clearly see the long noses, clenched enlarged fists, Klingon-like angry expressions, pointing fingers, and sticky secretions on the hands.  So, aside from the obvious, the drug made others aware when they were in the presence of a person who would hurt them somehow.  In a single glance, onlookers knew to get away from these people.

The pill had strange positive effects on people, too. For instance, those who sought to help others and truly believed that through their work, they could make the world a better place looked younger.  In the balding, their hair actually grew back.  Injuries and illnesses disappeared, they became increasingly fitter, their eyesight and hearing became keener, and they reported feeling more energetic.  One woman, approaching fifty years old, did not have gray hair on her head.  No dye is needed, ever – and get this – she could heal people with her hands.  Crazy.

Imagine if this fiction could be true.  Most of the world’s anxiety would be gone – because so much of it is caused by negligent, selfish, angry, greedy others.  Nobody likes being lied to, lied about, scapegoated, blamed, or bullied.  We’d only have to look at the nose to be skeptical or believe anything said. Or to politely decline any overture for a meaningful relationship.  When the finger pointer comes toward you, just run.  Run while you still can.  And the bully, with those giant fists – one can prepare appropriately for confrontation.  Never run away because bullies enjoy people who flee.  And what fun would running away be?

Unfortunately, the world doesn’t work this way.  We have to find out who the liars and bullies are the hard way.  Or perhaps be lucky, depending upon who crosses our paths.  Since this pill does not exist, we must depend on our education system to give our children the necessary tools.  In schools, we call this Social Emotional Learning.  And when you read or hear me referring to this, know that I am talking about the tools that all people need to grow in their social and emotional lives. 

These are Responsible Decision-Making; Relationship Skills; Social Awareness; Self-Management, and Self-Awareness.